You know, it takes a strong marriage to do what we’ve done. As I contemplate the next stage of our adventure, I feel comforted by the solid nature of Us. I wouldn’t have gotten into any of this if I thought our alliance couldn’t bear the weight of such a caper. Over the years we’ve endured many a challenge and overall I think we’re better for it. Certainly we’ve learned and grown a great deal, both as individuals and as people who’ve pledged to love, honour and disobey each other through thick and thin.
This past weekend I was reminded of just how far we’ve come. About a year into my relationship with Neil, I asked him a stupid question. Some of the details are fuzzy but I think we were watching Sleepless in Seattle and I made the colossal error of asking him how long he’d wait to date again if I died. Serious as a terminal illness, he said, “I’d say a month.” Call me a romantic but this answer left me a little cold. Let’s see, a week for my cremation, televised funeral, lying in state fanfare and national parades and then, just three weeks later, he’s buying drinks for some spray-tanned floozie in a sequined tube top and hooker heels.
It has become a long running joke in our house and, because I’ve matured so much in the last 10 years, I’ve come around to his line of thinking. So the other day, I decided to let him off the hook. I said, “When I die I don’t think you should wait even one day to start looking for someone new. In fact, go straight from the the crematorium to one of those speed dating sessions. You could take the diamond encrusted urn and lay it on the table. It’ll look right classy plus score some major sympathy from the ladies.”
“Or better yet,” he said, “I could just put the ashes in a big hourglass to keep the time.” And that, my friends, is the state of this union.
And as long as we’re talking about what it takes to make a good marriage, I had planned to show you a YouTube video (Isaac’s live lip-dub proposal) of the sweetest marriage proposal in history, now blocked due to copyright infringement law. What that says about marriage I’m not sure. Anyway, as I was watching it all warm and fuzzy like, all I could think was if the rest of their lives have as much love, joy, support and friendship as seen on that day, he too will one day use her ashes to time his speed dates.